Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction


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1 Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Wed 02 Jun 2010, 03:04

GuiltyPleasures


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This is my first attempt at fan fiction of any type. I'm going to post part of something I wrote and if you guys like it, I'll post more. So without further delay...

THE TIME: the not so distant future.
THE PLACE: a large metropolis in the American Midwest.

----------
She remembered it all as she stood on that stage, the crowd's roaring in her ears.
----------

Jordan lay in her cell, her "home" for the last five years, accused of crimes against the "government" that had taken over the United States. She hated the puppet president, because she didn't run anything. She was just a figurehead for the real people in power. Those are the people who tore Jordan away from her love, Jacob, and stole their child from her.

Her crime? She dared to become involved with someone who was not of her faith, who allegedly led Jordan to commit treason, and brought a mixed faith child into the world. For these crimes, she was at first declared insane, then declared an enemy of the state. Now, after years of torture, abuse, and having her daughter snatched from her at birth, Jordan expected to be punished, as if what had already happened to her wasn't punishment enough.

Her nightmares were always the same: a rally she and Jacob attended was raided by the "government" troops loyal to only the leaders and not to the country and its people. Their target was a man named David, who had been speaking, but he had already left when the raid took place. Jacob was one of the organizers, and when the troops found him, they shot him in the head in front of Jordan, then dragged his body through the streets. More troops arrested Jordan and scores of others, jailed them without charging them for months and in some cases, including Jordan's, years. Jordan didn't even have to be sleeping to have the nightmares. She had flashbacks every time she heard people being tortured.

A woman had come to Jordan in her cell and, noticing she was with child, told Jordan that she would never see her child after it was born, because Jordan was being sent to another facility to serve out the rest of her sentence.

"I was never charged with anything, never saw a day in court!" Jordan exclaimed. "I will be set free."

"No, you won't, you Resistance whore," the matron barked at her. "You've already been convicted of treason, of enciting violence against the government, and having a child with one not of your faith. Your child will never know you or know the circumstances of how it came into the world."

"I don't accept punishment from a kangaroo court," Jordan spat back. "If you have convicted me without a fair trial, then you've turned this country into a police state, and I will fight harder to put your kind in prison. You've committed treason, not me!"

Just then, Jordan felt the matron's hands around her neck, choking the life out of her. Since her hands were free, Jordan grabbed the woman's hair and yanked on it, the pain of which forced the matron to let go of Jordan's neck.

"You stupid bitch," the matron screamed at Jordan; "you will die for this insubordination!" She then turned and left Jordan's cell.

Weeks later, Jordan gave birth to a daughter she would have named Rachel. Jordan was drugged during labor, and when she came to, was told that her child was a girl and that she was stillborn. Jordan mourned her loss, but never really believed her daughter was dead. She had heard that children of those in the Resistance were often placed with families who supported the illegal government, and indoctrinated in their beliefs. Jordan hoped her daughter was still alive, even if she was placed with one of those families. That way, Jordan could search for her.

But now, five years on, Jordan's single consuming thought was to escape the hell she was forced into.

She knew the "Resistance" was stronger than ever, because the cells in her prison never seemed to be empty. She recognized voices of those she had known before Jacob was murdered. None of those voices seemed to be that of the Resistance leader, David. If they had caught him, Jordan thought, surely they would have killed him.

Jordan always heard this phrase when she was feeling scared: I will stand and fight. I'm not afraid to die. In order to fight, Jordan knew she had to escape. All she needed was the opportunity. And several had presented themselves, but without a plan, Jordan knew any attempt to escape would be an automatic death sentence.

Because she was allowed to work outside her cell, Jordan knew the layout of the prison well. A plan formuated in her mind that if she could just get outside the gates, she could make a run for it. There was a city outside her cell window, and she knew she could find her way to a Resistance house pretty easily. They were mostly in the industrial areas of the city.

When she was back in her cell at the end of her shift, Jordan dreamed of escape... and the way things used to be.

to be continued...



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2 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Wed 02 Jun 2010, 03:50

Dawn_Cato


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I like it....so more to come?



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3 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Wed 02 Jun 2010, 05:02

Yumiyuri


Immortalized
Wow...continue please! xD

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4 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Wed 02 Jun 2010, 10:53

GuiltyPleasures


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Part 2:

Jordan had seen the changes coming, and they scared her. A woman with a photogenic face was elected President of the United States. She was not too bright in the ways of politics, which made her ripe for the post. The real power was held by old men who had no trouble sending innocent people to jail for crimes they didn't commit. They had abolished the Constitution, and ran things like dictators. If you weren't Christian, or were of another race, or were affiliated with those who weren't ideal with the "government" view of the new republic, you were an outlaw.

Jordan was a student then, and she knew enough about American history and the American government to know that what was happening was wrong. She met like minded people at school, where she was working on a Master's degree in public relations, and joined with them in an organized group to resist the changes. Even Jordan's family didn't know about her activities, because they didn't see what was happening and didn't believe Jordan when she tried to tell them. Her parents were clueless and her brothers thought she was overreacting.

She had met Jacob at one of the Resistance meetings and things between them went well. Their friendship progressed rapidly into a relationship, and they talked of marriage and starting a family, even though Jordan was Catholic and Jacob was a Jew. They thought that it didn't matter about the faith aspect, because they managed to work around it, each learning more about the others views. Jacob thought Jordan was a stunning creature with her long dark hair and piercing brown eyes and olive complextion. Jacob was no slouch in the looks department either; dark, curly hair. Dark eyes. Five foot ten and well built. People agreed that they'd have beautiful babies.

Then when Jordan was seven months pregnant with Jacob's child, they attended the rally where David spoke. David was an eloquent and charismatic speaker, and everything he espoused was what Jordan came to believe about the new "government": that they were hell bent on running the country into the ground, and killing or imprisoning anyone who disagreed or got in the way. David had a high price on his head, as did his deputies. As an organizer, Jacob, too, was in danger. Everyone involved with the Resistance knew the risks and were willing to die for the cause. The future of the United States was at stake.

Only the "government" called them the "Resistance". They called themselves the Disturbed Ones, because the direction the country was taking was disturbing to all.

As Jacob was taken away to have his body paraded in the streets, Jordan was arrested and taken to a facility that she knew torture took place. She would be asked questions about the leaders and their whereabouts, something that she didn't know as she had not met any of them (though Jacob had).

----------
She had been allowed to remain in a cell until her baby was born, but after that, she was prepared to die for the cause. After she had been told her daughter was dead, Jordan underwent such extreme abuse and not given up anything the "government" wanted to hear, rape and torture was next in an attempt to break her spirit. When that failed, a court convicted her in absentia and sentenced her to life in prison, a sentence Jordan would not accept. This is why she needed to escape.

For months she formulated her plan of escape, keeping the details in her head. She found out there were to be a series of rallies where David and the other leaders would be speaking, and Jordan was determined to get to one of them.

She enlisted the assistance of a guard who wavered on his devotion to the "government". He was not serving by choice. He had been forced away from his school and enlisted in the "New Army". Jordan also decided that she would take advantage of his crush on her to get off the prison grounds. The guard, whose name was Justin, did Jordan small favors. This went on for months, then one day, Justin confessed that he really sided with the Disturbed Ones, had secretly attended several rallies, and believed in the cause. Jordan was skeptical. She thought he'd say anything not to be away from her after her escape. But, she realized that she had no one else to trust.

The day arrived that Jordan was going to make her escape with Justin's help. Justin's job was to make sure that Jordan got to and from her job within the prison. Jordan worked in the laundry and laundry for all the inmates went outside to be cleaned. Usually a guard drives the truck to take the off site laundry and watches as inmates unload.

Jordan was asked to join the crew that went off site. This was her one chance to escape, as Justin was the guard/driver this time. It was soon time to put her plan into motion.

The truck made its delivery without incident, but on the way back to the prison, Jordan set off a flash bomb which incapacitated everyone in the truck's cargo area. Jordan exited the back of the truck and took off running. Justin wasn't far behind, intent on catching her because he had just realized that Jordan duped him.

“Jordan! Stop, Jordan!” he called after her, but she seemed to not hear him. She just kept running.

Justin let her go. His job was done. Now he needed to get to safety himself before someone from the prison realized he was missing.

----------
She found one of the abandoned buildings that the Disturbed Ones had rallies in. She collapsed in a corner, exhausted. She was free! She felt bad that she had to dupe Justin to get this far, but the future of the country depended on Disturbed Ones like her to set things back to the way they were before this puppet government took over and recinded all freedoms.

to be continued...



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5 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 00:01

GuiltyPleasures


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Part 3--

A long haired man in his forties approached the door of the bus where his Disturbed Ones cohorts were meeting. It appeared that a hero of the cause had been found after five long years, and they were meeting to get progress reports on this person's whereabouts.

He entered and was greeted by the three other men in the room. They had been together for many years, and they were determined to set things right and expose the corrupt government.

"Dan, I'm glad you could join us," the leader, David, said warmly. "The family is well?"

"Yes, we're all doing well," Dan said. "Do I understand correctly that Julia's mother has been found?"

"Indeed," another man, Mike, said. "Our spies found her and one of them has broken her out of the facility she was being held in."

"But there's a problem," John, the fourth member of the group said. "Justin lost her because she ran as soon as the flash bomb went off. He said she was headed in this direction, but not which building she was headed to."

David stood and stretched, then said, "We have Morbus searching for her."

"Morbus scares me!" Dan exclaimed. "He'll surely scare her."

"He does know how to be gentle. He's not all brute force. He was human once... before his accident and imprisonment." David said.

"I trust he'll be gentle with her," Mike said. "We don't want to lose her again. She'll surely be killed if she's recaptured."

"I have faith in Morbus," David said. "He will bring her to us unharmed." To John, he said,

"Julia is doing well?"

"Yes, David," John said. "She is. She is very intelligent for her age. She scares her guardians with what she knows."
"Jacob was a very bright man, John," David said. "If you'll recall, both he and Jordan scored well in standardized intelligence tests in college. Julia's intelligence comes to no surprise to me."

The four men talked for a while longer about the progress of the Disturbed Ones, then David dismissed them. He would meet with Jordan Terranova alone.


----------
A strange voice was calling her name.

She had fallen asleep, and when she awoke, she faced a hideous sight.

It was a man, or at least Jordan thought it was a man. He was disfigured, wearing a hood, torn pants and broken shackles around his arms, legs, and neck. His eyes were slits that were blood red, and a smile that would give any reasonable person nightmares for life.

Jordan recoiled in horror. She didn't know what to make of this creature who knew her name.

“Who...who are you?” she asked, voice shaking uncontrollably.

“Who am I?” the disfigured man asked; “Who am I? Some call me 'The Guy'. But the name I prefer is Morbus.”

“Latin,” Jordan said. “Sickness.”

“Yes,” Morbus said. “You are a very intelligent girl.”

Morbus helped Jordan to her feet. They walked a few feet, then Morbus showed Jordan someone laying in a corner, unconscious. Jordan immediately recognized Justin. She gasped. He looked dead. Is this what she did to him?

“Morbus...” she asked, afraid of the answer she would get; “Is he dead?”

“You know him, don't you?”

“He helped me get away from the prison that has been my hell for the last five years.”

“He came looking for you. I thought he meant you harm.” Morbus almost looked apologetic.

“His name is Justin. He said he believed in our cause.”

“We can use him,” Morbus said, “but you realize that because he helped you escape, his life is in danger.”

Jordan hung her head, “Yes,” was all she said.

Morbus told Jordan that Justin was not dead, but he was injured. “He will get the best care our cause can give him, Jordan.”

Just then, several people came out from seemingly nowhere and took Justin's unconscious body away.

When they were alone again, Jordan had to ask Morbus a question she wasn't sure he could answer. Morbus sensed her hesitation.

“Jordan, what is it?”

“I have to know if you know something,” she looked at him with tears in her eyes.

“Your daughter?”

Jordan was shocked. How could he possibly know about that? All she could say is, “yes. What happened to her, Morbus? Is she dead like they told me?”

“No, Jordan,” he said. “Her name is Julia, and she's being raised by a family of Disturbed Ones. She knows about the sacrifices you and Jacob made to bring her into the world.”

Jordan broke down crying. He daughter was alive and being raised by people who have the same beliefs she and Jacob would have raised her with.

Morbus then lead Jordan to another room and asked her to wait. When Morbus left, Jordan became frightened. What was going to happen to her now?

She waited for what seemed like hours. She grew more and more anxious as the minutes ticked away.

to be continued...



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6 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 00:41

tswmcello


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Wow this is a great narrative, I look forward to the next installment

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7 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 01:04

GuiltyPleasures


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Thanks! There's at least one more installment that is finished...I'll post it soon.



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8 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 01:15

CrowX


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Wow just read the whole thing very impressed hope there is more

liked this part “Who am I?” the disfigured man asked; “Who am I? Some call me 'The Guy'. But the name I prefer is Morbus.”

“Latin,” Jordan said. “Sickness.”

“Yes,” Morbus said. “You are a very intelligent girl.”



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9 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 08:16

tswmcello


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That was probably my favorite too

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10 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 12:09

Yumiyuri


Immortalized
DUDE, THAT WAS AWESOME!

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11 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 12:55

GuiltyPleasures


Global Moderator
Part 4--

David walked from the bus into the building without being seen. He knew the price for his capture was high, and that death would most certainly be the result.

He knew that there were spies within the organization, just as he had spies assigned to the prisons where Disturbed Ones were being held on trumped up charges. Many had confessed and joined the ranks of the Disturbed Ones. Justin was one of those. If Justin were a double agent, as David suspected, he'd have no choice but to hold Justin accountable if something were to happen to Jordan as a result.

David wanted to assure Jordan that she was safe. He would even personally guaratee it, if that's what Jordan wanted.

Before his death, Jacob personally asked David to take care of Jordan and their child. David gave his word that if Jacob were to die fighting for the cause, then he would be obligated to.

During the years that Jordan's whereabouts were unknown, David wondered if she were even still alive. The stories he heard of the torture and beatings and sexual assaults against her were horrific. He swore by all he held sacred that he would protect her if it turned out that she had survived all that she had been through.

Since learning that Jordan Terranova was indeed still among the living, it was time for David to keep his word.

He then heard the familiar heavy footsteps coming down the hall.

----------
"David, she is here," Morbus said to the bald figure in black who sat with his back to the doorway Morbus stood in.

The black clothed figure turned around to face Morbus. He knew who Morbus referred to. It had been his plan to help this person escape her imprisonment on bogus charges.

"Then Justin succeeded in his task," David said. "He successfully infiltrated the prison guards and got to his target. So, where is he?"

"I've incapacitated him, David," Morbus said. "He came running after Jordan and I thought he meant her harm. I didn't realize it was him until after I knocked him out. I am sorry, David. I've arranged to get him medical care."

"As long as you didn't kill him, Morbus," David said. "He will need to be debriefed when he is able. He knows a lot about the 'government' plans for the country. We need to know what he knows." And he knows a lot more than he's telling, David thought. I'm sure of it.

"Yes, David," Morbus said.

David arose from his chair. "Where is Miss Terranova now, Morbus?"

"She is in the holding room as you instructed, David."

"Very good," David said. Then, "Did you tell her about Julia?"

"I did, David," Morbus said. "She broke down in tears when I told her. She had been praying her daughter was still alive."

"You know what Jacob's last request of us was, don't you, Morbus? If something were to happen to him?"

"Yes. For us to take care of her and their child."

"Make sure that Julia's guardians are aware that her mother has been found," David said. "And Morbus... you have done well."

"Thank you, David."

David dismissed Morbus, who disappeared into the darkness without a sound.

----------

Jordan heard a voice. A familiar voice. One that she knew well.

“Jordan Terranova,” the voice said. “Turn around and face me.”

Jordan was afraid not to turn around as she was asked.

Before her stood David, the leader of the Disturbed Ones. She would have known his voice, and his face, anywhere. He wore all black as was his custom, and his piercing, dark eyes looked at her in a way she started to feel uncomfortable with.

"You're David," was all she managed to say.

"Yes, Jordan," he said softly. "I am honored to be in your presence."

That statement took Jordan by surprise. He was honored to be in her presence? What the hell was going on here?

"I-I don't understand," Jordan stammered.

"You've suffered greatly for the cause, Jordan," David said, "and for that, one can only admire your strength. A lesser woman would have become emotionally handicapped by losing her lover, then her freedom, and then to have her child taken from her and told that child was dead. Your courage has given me strength when my spirits flagged. I only wondered if you were still alive. Yet, here you are, standing before me."

"I went through all that because our country is in trouble, David," Jordan said. "I want to help restore it to its former glory, and not the police state it is now."

David looked at her in much the same way that Jacob had when he was still alive. Jordan couldn't decide if it was admiration... or lust. She knew David had been with several women, none of whom lived up to his high standards.

"I know, Jordan, and your help, courage, and loyalty to the cause had made you a legend and a true hero." David then took her hand and led her to yet another room. This room had a crowd of people, Disturbed Ones like herself, who wanted the same things for their country as she did-- to return it to greatness and impeach the puppet government.

Soon, they were on a stage standing before this devoted gathering. David took a microphone and started to speak...

"MY BROTHERS, MY SISTERS, MY BLOOD! SPEAK TO ME!"

Jordan was deafened by the noise the crowd made in response. They began chanting, but Jordan couldn't make out at first what they were saying. Then it dawned on her:

"We won't be coming home tonight. Our generation will put it right."

David then called for silence, and almost immediately, the crowd fell silent. He then introduced Jordan to the assembly, and they cheered wildly for her. Jordan was confused, then David told the crowd:

"This is the woman we have all hoped would be here among us one day. Jordan Terranova believed in the cause from its infancy, and she has sacrificed much. Her freedom. Her lover, the late Jacob Rossman. Their child. Her very life she was willing to give for the cause; the cause of saving our country. She is our heroine. Our strength. Our ideal. Please make her feel welcome to be back among us!"

Jordan looks confused, David thought. She doesn't see herself as a hero. And as the crowd cheered for her, David's admiration of her increased. Maybe she's the one who is meant to be my equal.

As for Jordan, at first she didn't understand why the crowd was making all this noise on her behalf. She wasn't special, she went through everything she had because then, as now, she believed in the cause. And it had been worth it. We will win, she said to herself.

But all she wanted right now was to get off that stage, sleep in a real bed, and maybe someday soon, meet her daughter.
----------

This is all I've written as of now. I have other ideas for how the story will progress, but I'd like to hear, based on what you've read so far, what you think should happen from this point.

Yes, Jordan will meet her daughter. I'm writing that scene now. But what else? Feel free to make suggestions, ask questions, leave additional comments.

Thanks for all the feedback I've received so far! I'm glad you all have liked what has been posted. I almost didn't post any of this, because I'm my own worst critic and always have been as far as my writing is concerned.



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12 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 13:11

Yumiyuri


Immortalized
That was awesome! Please post more!

And if you have free time, can you also lend a critical eye over my story? The title is Believe xD

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13 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 17:23

tswmcello


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Wow, yet another stellar entry, I once read a series about something sort-of like this, what would make this even sweeter is some sort of like background on Morbus, maybe like in his thoughts for an installation. Just to see who he really is, you know? Maybe you could like replay a scene from his childhood that made him this way or just something like that. It's obviously your choice you're the one writing it, but overall this is just amazing, a little longer chapters and a complete story could show this to be a book someday.

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14 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Fri 04 Jun 2010, 17:57

GuiltyPleasures


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tswmcello wrote:Wow, yet another stellar entry, I once read a series about something sort-of like this, what would make this even sweeter is some sort of like background on Morbus, maybe like in his thoughts for an installation. Just to see who he really is, you know? Maybe you could like replay a scene from his childhood that made him this way or just something like that. It's obviously your choice you're the one writing it, but overall this is just amazing, a little longer chapters and a complete story could show this to be a book someday.

I was contemplating doing a chapter on Morbus... how he got the way he is (or the way I described him here), and maybe a little more background on Julia's life after she was taken from her mother after birth.

And to think this whole idea got its genesis because of something I heard on YouTube. It was the old school intro to The Sickness that begins: "Docket number 031373..." (which of course is David's date of birth).

Thanks so much for your feedback. I'll definitely take your suggestions under consideration. That's why I asked for them to begin with.

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15 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 14:46

GuiltyPleasures


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Morbus: part 1--

When he was alone in his room were the worst times. The times when he remembered what happened to him all those years ago.

He would get out a picture of himself as he used to look before his disfigurement. He was a handsome young man with dark hair and dark eyes. He had the world at his feet, the love of a good woman, and he was about to become a father.

Then his whole world changed.

He knew the changes were coming. His life was at risk. He asked the people he worked with that if anything happened to him, to please take care of his lady and their unborn child. He was assured by the leader himself that his wishes would be honored.

The rally still had painful memories for him. He saw the troops of the new illegal government coming after everyone at the rally. He told his lady to run for her and their baby's lives. And she tried, but her girth slowed her down and she was soon captured. Then she had to watch as he was shot with a series of Taser bullets. When he collapsed, she was sure he was dead and started screaming his name. His last memory was of being semi conscious and being dragged away. He could still hear his lady's screams in his ears.

The troops soon realized that he didn't die after being shot. The bullets didn't work as planned; instead of being electrocuted, he was merely unconscious. What took place next made him wish he were dead. Because what happened to him shouldn't happen to a dog, much less a human being.

The torture was relentless. Electric shocks, beatings so severe that ordinary men died from them, and finally being doused with kerosene and set on fire. But still, he did not talk. He did not give up any information to the police troops who wanted the whereabouts of the Disturbed Ones' leaders and the names of any followers.

He knew his lady had been captured, and though he was weak from the physical abuse he had endured, he escaped his captors in search of his lady and their child.

Covered in third degree burns that were still healing, he made his way to several prisons in the following days until he found the one his lady was being held in. He kept out of sight of the matrons, but overheard several talking about what they were going to tell the "Resistance whore" about what happened to her child. They agreed to tell her the child was stillborn, then send the child to a family who would raise it as their own and teach it about the new government.

He had heard a baby crying, and soon saw a matron bringing a bundle down the corridor and place it in an isolette. On the isolette was the mother's surname and the gender of the child contained therein.

He noticed that the surname was that of his lady, and that the child was female.

A wave of pride came over him. He had a daughter! He and his lady were going to name her Rachel Julia. Then he remembered what the matrons had said about where the baby was going and knew that he had to get her out of there somehow.

For some reason, the child was left alone in plain sight with no matrons or guards watching over her. He walked over, picked up the baby and simply walked out of the prison hospital with her.

He knew he had to get the baby somewhere before she got hungry or wet and started crying. He realized that a Disturbed Ones safe house was nearby, and went straight there. At this particular safe house was where one of the deputies lived with his family.

He waited until dark, then knocked on the door in such a manner that the occupants knew it was another Disturbed One on the other side.

A woman answered the door and immediately screamed. Her husband came over to see what the fuss was about, and asked who his visitor was.

He gave his name, and the husband didn't believe him at first. "Several witnesses watched him get shot at point blank range! How could you be him?"

He said the one phrase that would identify him to the man at the door. Upon hearing that phrase, the man let him inside. After explaining to his wife who their visitor was, she took the baby into another room and made a phone call.

"Whose baby is that?" the man asked.

"Mine," he said. "Mine and Jordan's. The prison matrons were going to tell her the baby died, then send the child to live with a family of sympathizers. I couldn't allow that to happen."

"Of course not, Jacob," the man said. "I'm glad you brought the baby here." The man stopped suddenly, then asked, "Do you know how disfigured you are, Jacob?"

"I haven't seen myself, but I figured I must be pretty scary looking based on the fact that your wife screamed as soon as she saw me."

"I think you need to see," the man said. "It's not a pretty sight, let me tell you."

He was led to a room that had a large mirror. He took one look at himself in it and immediately vomited. This can't be what I'm going to look like forever! he thought in anguish. I can't go back to Jordan looking like this! I may as well be dead.

When the man returned to the room, he saw the look on Jacob's face and knew that he knew that he was not the same man he had been.

"I can't be part of Jordan's life looking like this. I look like a nightmare!"

The man said, "We'll talk to David and see what he thinks."

(to be continued)



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16 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 16:05

tswmcello


Believer
Completely awesome!! So the baby is Morbus and Jordans? wow, much better than what I had in mind when I was suggesting the part on Morbus. This would make an epic book if expanded enough. It could be a Disturbed ones classic lol. more please!

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17 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 16:13

GuiltyPleasures


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tswmcello wrote:Completely awesome!! So the baby is Morbus and Jordans? wow, much better than what I had in mind when I was suggesting the part on Morbus. This would make an epic book if expanded enough. It could be a Disturbed ones classic lol. more please!

Yes, when Morbus was still known as Jacob.

There's more coming... thanks for the feedback!



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18 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 21:26

Yumiyuri


Immortalized
OMG, that was so cool! That was mindblowing, seriously! Keep up the great work and I'll be waiting for the next chapter xD

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19 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 21:53

GuiltyPleasures


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Morbus --Part 2

While it was still dark, Jacob and Dan, the man he had gone to see, were in an armored vehicle headed towards a secret location. This is where they would meet up with David, the leader of the Disturbed Ones.

To Jacob, it seemed like it took forever to get to where they were going. His healing burns were itching, and it was taking all of his willpower not to scratch at them. Meanwhile, he was growing weak. Jacob knew that he was losing consciousness and prayed he would die. Take me now, God, he prayed silently; please, take me now!

By the time they arrived at the undisclosed location, Jacob was unconscious and his breathing was shallow. It looked as though Jacob's prayer would be answered.

----------

In a hospital meeting room, the leaders of the Disturbed Ones met to discuss the unexpected resurrection of Jacob Rossman.

"We can't allow him to go back to his old life," Dan said as he and three other men sat around the table; "Too many people witnessed his 'death'. So what are we going to do with him?"

"Since he's not dead, and since he had the forethought to break out of capitivity to search for Jordan and their newborn daughter, and bring the child to us, we'll need his obvious strength to further our cause... provided he survives the infections he's contracted as a result of risking his life to reunite his family," said Mike, another deputy. "David, what do you think?"

David looked concerned. If Jacob were to die of his injuries and infections, they would never know where to look for Jordan, and the illegal government troops known as the "New Army" were bound to be looking for him.

Then again, David thought, since the illegal government tortured this man almost to death, perhaps they won't bother looking because Jacob would probably die of his injuries.

"We have to help Jacob, no question," David said. "We need to find Jordan, no matter how long it takes. She is the key to Jacob's survival. She and the child. I was thinking that when Jacob is well enough, we could train him to be an enforcer and a bodyguard. He has the physique for it. And, he'll need a new name, something simple."

"Like what?" John asked. He was another deputy, the youngest of the four. "He obviously can't be Jacob anymore. The New Army would be looking for him under that name."

David pondered that for a few moments. While semi conscious, Jacob said two things that stuck in David's mind. One was the name he wanted to give his daughter, Rachel Julia; the other was that after seeing himself in a mirror, he resembled the Disturbed Ones mascot, called Morbus.

"We could call him 'Morbus'," David said. "Jacob himself said he looked like our mascot's drawing with all his injuries."

The other three men nodded in agreement. Jacob Rossman was dead, and Morbus had come to take his place.
----------

It was weeks later when Jacob regained consciousness. The first person he saw was David. Jacob had tubes down his throat and could not speak. He also discovered he could not see because bandages covered most of his face.

"You're in a hospital run by Disturbed Ones, Jacob," David said. "You damn near died.

"Your daughter, who was named Julia, is with a family who will care for her until we find Jordan. All we know now is that shortly after she gave birth, Jordan was transfered to a facility that employs some of the torture practises that were used against you. So far, Jordan has not given the illegal government anything they can use against us. Even after being threatened with rape and death. But, we will find her. You have my word.

"However, since so many people, including Jordan, witnessed your 'murder', your life as Jacob Rossman is over. Even when we find Jordan, you cannot tell her who you really are. You've been given a new name and a new position in the organization. When you are well enough to be released, you will be known simply as Morbus, and your new position will be that of enforcer/bodyguard. Your strength is meant to be used against our enemies. Nod your head if you understand what I've just told you."

Jacob nodded his head. Yes, I understand, David.

At least, Jacob thought, I can still be close to my daughter, and Jordan will not have to deal with my new life as Morbus. I'll simply have to forget Jordan exists. It's the only way I can deal with losing her.

----------

Upon his release from the safe hospital, Morbus was moved into a safe facility that helped him regain some of the movement he lost as a result of his disfigurement. He lifted weights, exercised, and learned martial arts. He already knew how to shoot firearms. Military style training was added when doctors deemed him ready for full duties as David described to him.

In his room, Morbus forced himself to look in the mirror at his new face. He had no hair on his head at all, including eyebrows, facial hair, and the wavy curls that Jordan had fallen in love with. Jordan no longer existed in his world, except for those times, like now, when he remembered the man he used to be.

"Jacob Rossman is dead; God have mercy on the soul of Jacob Rossman" Morbus said sadly. "I am... Morbus. I am...The Sickness."
----------



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20 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 22:10

Yumiyuri


Immortalized
Awesome as ever! xD

I'll be waiting for the next chapter xDDD

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21 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sat 05 Jun 2010, 23:35

tswmcello


Believer
Wow, this just gets better! Please keep going! That chapter was absolutely great, it really brings us to present day Morbus and why he isn't talking to Jordan.

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22 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sun 06 Jun 2010, 01:33

Dawn_Cato


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This is good reading...thank you for posting,, it seems you really have a passion to write I'm impressed.



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23 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sun 06 Jun 2010, 09:07

OMG I LOVE IT! Cant wait for more!you are an amazing writer!

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24 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sun 06 Jun 2010, 10:43

GuiltyPleasures


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Julia, part 1--

Kiera and Peter San Marco had long wanted a child of their own. Kiera was unable to have children and, at some future point in time, the couple planned to adopt.

Long time Disturbed Ones, they both saw the collaspe of the government as a travesty. Rights and freedoms were taken away. People around them were being assimulated into the new, illegal government's mindset, led by a female President. The San Marcos knew that what was happening was against everything they had ever been taught, and further feared for their very survival because they were a mixed race couple. Interracial and interfaith couples were being arrested every day, and they were horrified by the stories they heard about what the government was doing to them.

It was this that led the couple to their first rally soon after the puppet government gained power. They were surprised by the hundreds of thousands of people who turned out to hear David, the self professed leader of the Disturbed Ones, speak about taking the country back from those who had stolen it. Kiera, especially, was interested in fighting back, because she had watched as her parents were arrested and led away to some remote location simply because they, themselves, were an interracial couple. Kiera's father was Native American; her mother was Hispanic and caucasian. Kiera had no idea where her parents were being held, or even if they were still alive. Torture was the preferred method to punish those who had unknowingly broken the racial and religious laws the illegal government had enacted.

Since they could not become parents in the usual way, and had decided to adopt at the time the illegal government was voted into power, they volunteered to take care of the children of fallen or captured Disturbed Ones. This is how they became the guardians of a two week old baby girl named Julia.

They knew of the death of Julia's father, Jacob Rossman, and the imprisonment of her mother, Jordan Terranova; they also knew of the bravery of Morbus, the disfigured bodyguard who rescued Julia from the prison hospital where she was born, and slated to be handed over to government sympathizers to be raised.

When Julia was brought over to their safe house, Kiera and Peter had been prepared for her, and had all the supplies on hand to take care of her for how ever long it took to find and liberate Jordan from her imprisonment.

From the outset, Kiera had become attached to Julia, who in time had the dark hair and dark eyes of her parents. Julia was truly a beautiful child and was a blessing to have the priviledge to raise, no matter how little or how much time it would take to find her biological mother.

----------
One night shortly after Julia's first birthday, Peter and Kiera learned that another child needed their guardianship. A four year old boy had been orphaned when his parents were murdered after attending a Disturbed Ones rally. There were no biological relatives who were willing to take the boy in, so the San Marcos were chosen to raise him. His name was Nikolai.

Nik was a good boy, and got along well with Julia. He seemed puzzled that his parents weren't coming to get him like they had so many other times. Peter had to sit down with Nik and explain what happened to his parents, and that he and Kiera would take care of him. Peter was taken aback when Nik asked,

"Are Julia's parents never coming back, too?"

"Julia's father isn't, but her mother is being held by the Bad Ones, and when she is able, she will come get Julia," Peter told him. "Until then, we're a family."

Nik understood and went off to find Julia.
----------
The San Marcos allowed Morbus, who had rescued Julia from the prison hospital, to see the little girl on occasion. While Nik was afraid of Morbus at times, Julia never was. Julia played games with Morbus just like she did with other adults. Despite his hideous appearance and his penchant for violence against the illegal government, he was extremely gentle with Julia. Almost like a father would be, Peter thought one day as he watched Julia play catch with Morbus.

"Maybe he had been a father before his disfigurement," Kiera told her husband one evening after the children were sleeping and Morbus had long since left their home. "I can't imagine he wanted his own children to see the monster he had become. But he is good with Julia. When she says her prayers, she always prays for Morbus."

"Perhaps Morbus is misunderstood because of his disfigurement," Peter said. "Looks count for way too much in society...at least the society that is currently out there. There should be more people like Julia and fewer people like Madame President." Peter almost spat "Madame President" because his dislike and distrust of her regime made him angry. Her illegal government was fully of "pretty people". Those who aren't as "pretty" were treated the same way Disturbed Ones and other undesireables were when they were captured. More torture, imprisonment, death.

Peter had to remind himself that Morbus was still human, no matter how grotesque his appearance might be.

----------
His visits to the San Marco home were never easy. He hated knowing that Julia was his flesh and blood, and not being able to tell her so. She was much too young to understand what really happened to her father.

Morbus kept a photograph of Julia on a table in his spartan living quarters. He had to remind himself that, just like Julia's games of "Let's Pretend", he had to pretend that he didn't have an emotional tie to the pretty four year old.


He wanted to tell her everything, but her age prevented him from doing so. Morbus was just happy to be near his little girl. She was the spitting image of her mother, Jordan, who was still locked up somewhere. Julia was not afraid of him like her "brother" Nikolai sometimes was. She accepted Morbus' appearance without question. Maybe that will be Julia's strength as she grows older, Morbus thought; that she could accept everyone as they are, and not as someone says they should be.

Even at her young age, Julia knew about what happened to her mother, and that Jordan was a hero. Morbus smiled slightly knowing that Jordan would be so uncomfortable being called that. Jordan's only motivation was to see the illegal regime toppled, and the Constitution be reinstated and the legitimate government be put back in power. Jordan didn't do what she did because of the the recognition it would bring, but because it was the right thing to do. Even at four years old, Julia knew that.

At the visit today, Julia had asked Morbus, "Morbus, when will my mama come for me? When will the Bad Ones let her go?"

"I don't know, Julia," he had replied, taken aback that Julia even knew about her mother's imprisonment, much less when she would be reunited with her.

"We are still looking for her. It might be a long time."

And with a young child's enthusiasm, Julia gave Morbus a hug. And it was that hug that had Morbus questioning himself about how much longer he could go on knowing that he was Julia's father, that he was not dead, that he wanted to be with her and her mother very much.

Sometimes, he wished that David would have just let him die.
----------
NOTE: This story is far from finished, however, there is at least one more chapter after the one posted here.

I appreciate all the comments and feedback I've been getting about this. It encourages me to keep writing. If you have any suggestions on how the story should progress, please let me know.

Jordan's meeting with her daughter is still being written. It's not as easy as I thought it would be. When I finish that, I'll post it, but it might be a while.

Again, thanks for all your encouragement. It is greatly appreciated! --Stef



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25 Re: Guiltypleasures' Disturbed fan fiction on Sun 06 Jun 2010, 10:59

Yumiyuri


Immortalized
Aww...poor Morbus...

I loved this chapter, keep writing xD

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